Here I am. This is me.
Define blue.
"Another day in the supressed environment where the overlords kept a constant poke on top of the canopy scanning the seas of it's sad and helpless minions busy on their work, satisfied and went smirking back to the lair."
Today is one of those days when we don't get to do any slacking ;). I was unusually busy on the new specs which came all the way down from denver today, when a new mail notification came in. Even being in the middle of discussion with the tech lead, my hands crept stealthily to the mouse clicking on the incoming message (i just can't bear to have surprises waiting unattended to).
and as usual, our eyes tend to dart across lines without reading them properly mining only important keywords constructing to the whole meaning. Imagin the chill i had down the spine when i spotted the phrase "im so unlucky", then "father passed away". Immediately, the mind went blank, the continues stream of technical speech from the tech lead sounds like a mose code now, everything in this world had been tuned down.
i took another good look, this time eyes squinted hard taking in word by word. the whole message was "the meeting is delayed till 3 o'clock. im so unlucky... his father passed away". It seems my friend's anxiously anticipated meeting had been delayed coz her ang mor boss's father had passed away. *shit. im easily started for nothing. she should stop doing this sometimes.
"sim, you following?"
"hell, definitely no." ...i can take on anyone after a good scare.
Last weekend was a fantastic experience of "the amazing race" taken aloft around The southern region to KL. It started off with a beutiful wedding of two friends : vivian and george at Melaka Riviera Bay Resort. Everything was good, the Chrisitan wedding ceremony, the grand hotel, the Celine Dion "My Prayer" song, "someone's uncle who can REALLY sing", the blessings, the good looking groom and beutiful bride, the cute flower child, and the warm satisfied loving looks exchanges between the couple... God, makes me feels like getting married one of these days.
It is a blessings, for these two people to be so long for each other together and on this day takes the oath to stay on forever, and ever as one in the blessings of the heavenly father. The whole constitution to the event is so beutiful beyond my limited words of expression. Marriage should be taken a serious attention of details to, it's an event once in a life time you'll always remember.
a very good memorable experience (and, my friend looks stunning in her dress). i should get married.
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After wine and dine, with a few really red cheeks. Some of us stayed over that night at the hotel enjoying the luxorious retreat. Nothing beats sandy beaches, good wine, and great company. The down turn is that the girls made us sleep in the living room on the sofas without blankets shivering through the winter night (girls are evil). Maybe they do come out for the toilet once a while late at night to check out our sexy shivering butt lying on the floor.
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On the following day we went around touring Melaka town and getting lost once in a while, just for the sheer feeling of playing a tourist. I always liked Melaka, of it's historical legacy and remains, of it's culture, mystical stories and myths. Aside the usual visits to the fort, tombs, churches and pirate ships, this time we went to check out a Native-art artist, Mr Charles Cham. The talented AND good looking fella runs the Orang Utan branding in two seperate shops in different street at the town centre. It's to my surprised to find the man himselfs hanging around his shop. Also went having lunch at the famous Hainan chicken rice ball place. With such a high volumn of tourist flow going on round, most of the uniquely famous food restaurant is always cramp and packed you'll have to wait a long line to get your turn. Oh, and melaka traffic is bad with small roads, poor city planning and stupid drivers (mostly tourists).
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Later on we continue our tours in various johor towns starting with Muar, then Batu Pahat, Yong Peng, and then Kanggak. And finally back to KL. This aint really Europh, but what's important was that we had a good time.
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It's 0521 on a surprisingly humid friday morning, and in another 15 minutes' time i'll be heading down Melaka on a freeway doing 140 miles per hour. Friend's wedding will commence on 1000, desperately need to be there early for preparations and stuffs. Case you are wondering, 10% goes to the enthusiasm in attending the wedding, 5% on practising more photo-takings around melaka and wedding, and 115% is to see my one other friend in her w00t w00t outfit. wooooo hooo. *[self high-five]
to my indian friends who apparently have no life and read my blogs on this day : happy dee-pa-va-li. (please dun go around burning things, as usual :D... and no thanks to any sweet milky stuffs).
to Sui Lin, if you are reading this : Welcome back. (and you so gonna hell make sure i get some vacationing gifts for saying that one). ;) kiddin. (maybe im not).
alright. I'm off. I hope there's less stupid people on the road today (the reason they're still out there is because it's illegal for me to kill them). adios amigos.
Subject: A Blonde in the casino
>
> Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table.
> A very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand
dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice.
>
> She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm
> completely nude." With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Come
on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!"
> As the dice came to a stop she jumped up and down and
squealed..."YES! YES! I WON, I WON!"
> She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and
her clothes and quickly departed.
> The dealers stared at each other dumfounded.
> Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?"
> The other answered, "I don't know - I thought you were watching."
>
MORAL: Not all blondes are dumb, but all men are men.
i woke up trying to remember my dreams... but all i could make out was : having to retrieve a document file, a secret organization serving exotic milk-fruit punch, a hooker joint hotel and zombies chasing me knob.
so i havent been sleeping well lately.
the unfinished codes from the office haunts me in my dreams.
Of all the recent tireness and emotional downturn for no apparent reasons, the empty hollow shell is taken over by sense of violence. i wish i could carry 4 handguns, 3 shotguns, 3 SMGs, 2 assault rifles, 1 sniper rifle, a dozen of grenades and molokov cocktails, running around with a small liberal army supply of ammo... and, the ability to do "bullet time", going on for days in the same trenchcoat without sleep or meal or bath, and an amazing metabolisme which replenish damaged tissues in seconds by chewing up painkillers like tic-tacs...
so many would have died then.
(lucky god invented video games.)
"every relationship is messed up, what makes it perfect is you still wanna be there when things really suck."
Despite myself being lost in the middle of nowhere... broken, confused..
I'm still enjoying the view.
here's some photos to last weekend's evangelism event. i shall write no more.
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The concert was two days ago i know, but i was far too tired to blog yesterday taking my time to recuperate from the stiff legs and sore voice as the result of too much jumping and screaming. I like Linkin Park's songs, but attending the concert was altogether a different experience with mixed emotions. I mean, it's the occasion where you so always wanted to be in but it turned out the environment wasnt so pleasing and the sense of being pushed too far to the back wasnt so good either. The open fields are crowded with 10,000 strong (assumption figure), half of them heavy sweating jumping smelly big hairy diamond backs gorillas who could make out every utter and grunt of LP's songs. I found myself having a hard time trying to get a good look at the performance stage and hearing the songs sang by the performing artists themselves. being in an open field, the sound system is mediocre, and the air wasnt that good either with ladened sweat and thin-air. Then, they made us wait so darn long and with the stupid performance from local group too-phat which is a total dismay. Those stupid american-black-wannabes are so stupid they couldn't take it literaly when the crowd booed them to "drop dead" or "at least go away". I also noticed quite a number of females in the crowd, which is a bad idea proven when the boyfriend have to soon shove them away from the mass before they choke and fainted, which i nearly did too myself despite getting a fresher air way up high, which depics the really bad case being stuck down and under for a normal height girls. consider the fact that most girls would suffer much from such environment (and i have yet to mention the "handy" mat rocks around), I told my friend i'm kinda glad that she din come anyway, a kinda selfish statement just to ward her from possible problems i'm too shitty to handle or having her to experience that herself. Maybe I'm just too protective at times, and that sucks.
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Music is into me these last few days, the whole week i've been attending choir, songs practises for events and wedding. I'm addicted to church hymns, or Enya alike. But today, for a sinister twist i will be flocking the stadium merdeka tonight amongst a 50,000 screaming fanatical fiends, hailing the much awaited rock-rap group Linkin Park. I hope i still retain my ability of speech after then for the thursday worship practise and the non-stop streak of coming events following then.
linkin park - LIVE in Kuala Lumpur
i hope it's not a bad call. (boy, this should be hella fun).
For guys, a sexy and/or cute girl walks by and all of a sudden we tug at each other and say, "oh! how cute!!!! did it go meow?"
it totally shows when a normal babe will always become a "chick", or a "cat" (aka pussy)
when guys meet sexy/cute babes, intelligent levels drop to an all-time low.
"at some point you're bound to make sacrifices. Giving up something you really want now for something you really wanted your whole life..."
I have reasons to believe myself to be part golden-retriever. coz with every problem which i had earlier thrown out, will be eventually, subconsciously retrieved back to me again.
and uncle sam says : you are a swine.
Everything bound to an endless loop until the universe we have known of cease to exist. *Sigh. Problem with hearts can be so persistant it almost felt butt-itch-annoying.
"I enjoy the moments of fun and laughter, having to realise that too much of the rest of my life demands serious attention."
A good friend of mine is having her 24th birthday today. At that age, still a cheeky jumpy little girl which never seems to grow old in the passing of time. I still remember having met her a year ago when she wore a pair of red shoes, white high socks, a pink jacket white tee, white mini skirt, and having her attended curly hair tied into two pony-tair (if that's the right words for them). She looks really kiddie in those outfit, and i told her that. I hope she took me seriously at least on that point. ;)
Anyway. Happy birthday girl!! You rock the world!! Take care and be good.
God bless.
"Unlike Summer, Authumn really knows how to treat a lady." - alex
I've been spending the past few nights watching the 46 Scrubs episodes. Everyone should watch it, every doctor should watch it, and every hospital should be playing it on their lobby and restrooms' tv. It's by far, the best comedy series I've seen. Those who haven't are seriously missing out a healthy portion of life! But if you don't agree with anything I said, you are just so WRONG!!!
Went for a medical check up during lunch, not feeling very well lately. The rib cage feels a great weight pressuring on it, and at times the heart felt like having a sudden adrenalin rush for no apparent reasons. The ECG procedure reveals my heart beat to be completely healthy, however the blood pressure is a little bit off scale, 140... that is if you make a clean cleave removing my head off the shoulders my blood will spurs 15 feet fountaining high above.
That's stress, doc said. I'm not sure if I felt stressed lately, for I hardly feel stress on work, and I hardly feel stress off work.. Infact, I have been living this way of life as far as I could remember.
Maybe it's the dolphin, koala, and sparrows which got me worried.
(Most of the people who read this thinks shin will possibly die mysteriously until he got his blood analysis report back on tuesday... Case if that happens, just follows the protocol).
there's this one thing on girl with cute animals. my friend was telling me, this other friend was having a meal with her boyfriend then a cat happens to cross by and the girl tug her bf's hand and say "oh look! how cute~~!! did it go "meow"??".
when smart girls meet cute things, intelligent level drops below zero. freezing, in fahrenheid.
The office is going to move to CyberJaya by Jan next year. The area is suppose to be a techie gizmo place with toilets which help massaging nuts and trimming your hairy backs. Infact, this place is SO hi-tech we need to share a public toilet with nokias and microsoft's minions considering the cost to duplicate them.
And, I heard the whole migratting comes in a packaged bundle. Which upon renting the place you'll get an uber intelligent dog which are capable of completing daily assignment an average office peons could attend to. They don't whine bout increment, boredom... Plus, it comes in varieties of breed and colours too! Now imagin having a dog running around the office doing errands like, "Hey Sparky. Could you go over the server and start up the Tomcat for me?" or "Sparky, please port the Access DB into MySQL? I'll be needing it before EOW today". And in the terms and conditions statement, it's advisable to use "please" or "could you?", for a dog with high intelligent and independant thoughts, afterall it's hard to predict if the dog would snap and plan to drug the office water or set a live wire to office metal railing.
Besides. it is relatively easier to spot if he's browsing pethouse.com or working.
Sparky debugging codes...
Still, we are very much looking forward to our new settlement (I say that without basis and with no apparent reason whatsoever).
"To get to where Bill Gates is now, you'll need to travel back through time and murder the bastard..."
1. I can strangely sense the change of humidity in the atmosphere.
2. ...and this morning, I sensed a coming rain which tells me, despite my high enthusiasm to go to work, I should remain in bed instead
s
3. I am infact, the only human being able to do such accurate predictions. Closest living thing capable of such feat is a toad.
"Anyone who quotes anything I said is an idiot"
The first thought which came over was : ooh, nice name. Less than I would imagin was the picture I posted on the blog a couple of months ago, showing two guys and one girl holding hands (check out August's posts).
Now relationship is always a unique set of physics in these pre-defined world, for it is neither bounded to logics, senses, morality, nor even laws of nature. 2 8 carats diamonds doesnt get you 16, beuty is perceive by the heart but not the eyes, actions are no longer justified by laws but consciences, and water doesnt always flows to the lower end. In such a mass intercrossing randomness, nothing could be much predicted, explained, and even blamed.
I was chatting with a friend last night, someone I grew to respect and like being with and exchanging ideas alot over the years... We were discussing a debatable scenario of a traggical relationship.
Case study : Guy A and guy B, both good friends accidentally bumped into a girl in a shopping mall, and by the allignment of stars and constellations and planets that they got to know each other pretty well and the girl brings them to her church and hangs out together. So then, guy A started going after the girl and went steady with her, guy B being guy A's good pal just sits by and smile (doing what good friends do best). So after some few months, guy A have to go overseas for studies and leave his girlfriend to his best buddy to be taken care of. Off goes A and a couple of months more, the girl is starting to show liking to guy B, with signs of, u-know-those-girly-stuffs (we are not going to argue about that, but just take it by fact that the girl likes guy B). And, guy B had always liked the girl all along... so after some struggle (mentally) between both they decided to get together. They tried to tell poor-sod-A but was struggling on it (wondering how the news would break out to the guy)... and A kinda came back earlier than expected supprising them both, and himself. Totally. Nuclear meltdown. Ground zero.
So, the question is : whose fault it is for such a tragical turnout?
Skipper thinks the bitch should be hanged (actual words), my friend Ryan thinks it's nobody's fault as you can't seems to blame love for it's unlogical nature and we should always go for the hearts, my manager thinks it's the obvious way a relation should work, in a "try before you buy concept" (and 1 to 1 relationship is absurd), but I think : everyone of the involved party should be held responsible for the event outcome...
opinions, my rare viewers ;). I'm kinda anticipating what kim would have to say...
"I loved her enough, that when she had found someone who would give her better life and hapiness, could I let her go? I would... I had to."
It's just another fine rainy morning where you dont feel like writing or doing anything much less than lying in your nicely cleaned room with open windows, perfumed bed sheets, sipping mocha and listenning to enyas...
feels like home.
One thing still echoes in my hallowed mind, "who is Gemini Renee?"
