Here I am. This is me.
Define blue.
Alright, so I had my Java 1.4 developer exam yesterday.
And here I'm gonna tell you this... I passed!! (barely).
That's it. I pass. No more to that. ;) time for some official major slacking... (I'm gonna take some time off by the seaside or the misty mountains).
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(stares disdainfully) Great cerebrus papa dogs of hell!!... 300+ pages to go... (halucinating:"die zombie, DIE!!!")
A hamster's nightmare...
"I was wrong. It's not how good the guy can be, but how far is he willing to love you for..."
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"If dogs can talk, women will not be needing a boyfriend anymore..."
Yesterday, much to my surprise, I stumbled across a 38G of uncharted galaxies in my workstation.
It's amazing how close things are under your nose without having you realizing it...
it's just a matter of where to look and what to look for I guess.
"... and finally when the guy went to heaven, he ask God, 'Father, why did i loose her??'. And God replied, 'No, son. You let her go...'"
Rest in pieces.
"Fate is not just whose cooking smells good, but which way the wind blows."
Have you ever heard of giggles made, in which are capable of stealing souls?
I have.
(I should kill myself, I should kill myself, I should kill myself...)
I pray she enjoys her new working place well next month.
Have been busy lately, running around getting things done trying to patch up all the mistakes i've been causing lately... it seems I'm running off tempo, getting clumsy, getting inefficient, forgetful : im starting to make mistakes, I can't think and plan properly, undecisive, making bad decision. false judgement, unaccurate analysis, and my lines of words and expression often trails off into illiterable vowels like a sleeper in his dreams. something is definitely wrong in my head. and out of these sudden drop of performace, reality seems to take no heed in caving in my life.
As I said, I lost my phone, and my number, and my whole world of contacts in them (which suddenly shrink my life in half). Best I could do now is getting my number back, and pray in salvaging most of my geometrical spread of contact numbers. I went to Sungei Wang to look out for a replacement phone... but all those which I care to get is a bit too steep to my budget. Instead, my mindless trobing leads me to the top floor of LowYat Plaza, which I happened to stumbled across a leet 3 piece altec lansing speaker set. I knew it was fate, and I bought the set home, plug it in, play my collection of enya songs and melted into my chair... this is so zen... Better than cream, better than coffee, better than coffee with cream... in a split second I dun really remember or care of anything, anything at all...
Oh yea, a friend is switching her current cost control officer job in Capitol Hotel to Prince Hotel (dunno if i got the name right. my problem, sometimes i didn't get the word but don't bother asking her repeating herself) near Wisma Genting (Can someone tell me where on earth is wisma genting?). She heard I was getting a black special edition Wira, and her comment was : "but that car is so... beng!".
Leads me back to square one. Guess her opinion still means alot to me. Or maybe I should just take a gun and shoot myself.
Plans and agendas filled the whole to-do sheets. All the things to get, all the things to retreive, all the tasks to complete, all the people to meet, and all the places to go... This will be a busy week indeed.
"I always remember the past... so shall it reminds me not to forget the present" - shin
Inferior mortals, with their puny magic they snatch me from my planeshift, bound me to their material world, enslave me and barred me off the rest of my kin... I was weak, I was hapless.
I was traveling with my office sigma : the PDA, the Phone, and the Digital Camera... the tools I created to help me shape my world. They took my phone, they have in belong what they shouldn't be tangling with, they have part of my soul...
I need out, I need to reach to the rest of my kin... is Destiny overseeing this?
I will just wait, yes... and watch the mortals decay thru the passing of time. Then I will take my revenge. I will.
(I will need to get a new phone and number now, #@$@#$@$%%)
I like the stars. It's the illusion of permanence. I think. I mean, they're always flaring up and caving in and going out.
But from here, I can pretend.
I can pretend that things last. I can pretend that lives last longer than moments.
Gods come and gods go. Mortals flickers and flash and fade. Worlds don't last; and star and galaxies are transient, fleeting things that twinkle like fireflies and vanish into cold and dust.
But I can pretend.
Sometimes, someday, somewhere, somehow someone who left you broken four years ago called you and said they felt sad. What could you do? You just listen. You gave all your thoughts to what she has to say, and try to comfort her the best you could : acknowledging her thoughts, giving opinions, making jokes... It ends a quarter to an hour later, usually with "talking to you makes me feels alot better, thanks","take good care of yourself... if you need me, I'll be here"... then she would phase out from my life for another few years time...
She hurt my pride, when she declared she doesn't love me no more and left. It has been long, I haven't forgive her, and I still love her...
"What power does hell holds if they cannot dream of the heaven above?"
My older brother, Destiny, eldest of the endless, just completed his Sun Certified Java Programmer and Developer 1.4 exam yesterday, scoring a mighty 96/100... (Even those indians don't score this high...).
Now he's gloating over me to beat his mark. And I have two weeks to do so.
I've done it once, so shall I do it again. (just dun ask me if you dun see me posting anything in regards here after) ;)
"no single rain drop felt like being blame for the great flood..."
Back from my weekend short vacation. Didn't sleep too well, ended up wandering around aimlessly in the cold fog late at night. The nightscape is still very beutiful indeed, distant rolling hills decorated with orange lights illuminating the densely saturated low hanging fog. Too bad the rest of my friends were busy playing games of luck with uncle Lim.
More photos...
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and I too attended Chyi Ching's concert (not someone my few viewers would normally recognize...), together with his sister Chyi Yi, both famous 90's singer with a really good vocal. The concert was ok... I got the ticket for cheap so there's not much to complain. In the middle of it, I called a friend up to let her listen to the song "Yue Liang Dai Biao Wo De Xin", LIVE... instead she thought I didnt lock my keypad and called by accident, hang up on me. hehehehe.
Right, Monday morning. Still a long dream to go...
"what would you think of life when death is your older sister?" - sandman.
Evilly huge expensive dog guardian...
Again, justice has prevailed...
The horde of treasures... (princess should be pleased)
I'm going to Genting in the morning, to the highlands hoping to find dreams...
Again it seems, insomnia has found me.
"Friendship is a rope held at two ends. as hard as we might try, things fall with either party loosing end..."
At times when I'm alone, I dreamt of companies; many times when I'm surrounded, I dreamt of solitude.
What power does a mortal holds if he cannot dream?
(Maybe it's time to find someone to go out with and have meals together regularly.)
There was a chicken and a horse playing together in a barn yard, suddenly the horse falls into a pit. He yells to the chicken, "Go get the farmer, save me, save me!!!" THe chicken goes looking for the farmer but can't find him. So she gets the farmer's BMW and drives it over to the mud pit, lassoes the horse, ties it to the car and pulls him out. The horse says, "Thank you, Thank you, I owe you my life." Then a couple days later they are playing there again and this time the chicken falls into the mud pit and the chicken says, "Help me!!! Help me!!! Go get the farmer!!!". So the horse says, "No No No, I think I can get you." The horse stretches across the mud pit and tells the chicken, "Grab onto my penis!" The chicken grabs on, the horse stretches back, and the horse saves the chicken's life.
The moral of the story is, "If you have a penis the size of a horse's, you don't need a BMW to pick up chicks"
no offence to anyone ;). Just something my friend sent to cheer me up.
Went to KLCC today, it is to my amazement (and reminder) that women are indeed a very spectacular athlete with super human patience and stamina. After five hours of shopping spree, I am most eager to find a nearby stool to rest my aging bones on, giving remarks like "yes dear, you make the dress look good, can we like pack it up and move on?"... while my friend, still bouncing around humming the happy tunes like a school girl, checking on the next lines of Tunisia bronze chain lining necklaces... I dun know bout you guys out there, but we are naturally inclined, but bad in accompanying women on their shopping routine... and I'm sure they know that as well, that's why when most women intend to go on their shopping tour they will most definitely go alone or with fellow girl friend. I enjoy going shopping with a female friend, who inturn gives valuable insights on a female mind, but sometimes the interest does fades with waning patience.
Anyway, since I am in Isletan. it would be nice to check out the rumors I read on someone's board/journal/tag, that vanilla coke is available for sale here. Vanilla coke, tastes just like a float drink. Arguably the best drink ever created by man kind, the best drink ever imagined by man kind. Someone told me it's better than sex. Well, since I'm not given a choice to choose between, well, at least a bad drink would only damage my cells rather than corrupt my soul... So I bought the drink, I bought two infact.
for muhibah.
let's see if it gives me orgasm. ;)
I went to church last night. like how it went with the gospel camp in melaka, again my broken mind and hollow spirit is filled with renewed hope and understanding... things happened, infact, for a reason after all... just the fact that my pride and arrogance had to be taken down this way, is not to my liking at first, then again, a good medicine is always bitter to the taste.
This seminar today talks bout Chinese cultures and religions, from a pastor who was borne a Taoism priest. The whole talk has been really informative as the fabric of facts and fiction is being unfolded thru logics, science, and history bearing. our culture had not been any much wrongly taken than it is now. I bought the recordings on the topic... which I hope I could produce a written script of the 60 * 5 minutes long of lecture, then translate it into English reading material for my non-mandarin literate friends. I am neither good in English nor mandarin (nor Bahasa Melayu nor Japanese)... I was never good in any language anyway, stuck in the middle of nowhere, but I felt the need to translate such a good informative topic, in hopes that it shall bring understanding to whoever reads it. I pray for enough patience, skills and support in the bidding.
and i hope the heavenly father agrees on what Im doing.
shin wrote : it was great. too bad you werent there. i returned with much more i thought i would discovered in a long mile. i cant explain much here, il tell you bout it next time. there's so much to be felt. | More image
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I'm so tired.
Everything is a puddle of thick sticky hot mocha swirling in my head...
I need time to sort them out, I'm so sure I learnt something useful from the whole event...
Give me sometime before I blog again.
p/s : I hope everyone is alright. Cheers.
